You could have just kept quiet and all would have been fine, but no, you had to tell her how all those things made you feel. It was more than two years ago, move the FUCK ON. Because of your stupidity and cruelty you hurt her and made her hate you. She thought you were nice but now she sees the horrible person you truly are. You're a monster.
The screaming and insulting do not justify what you have just done. You have just made a irreparable mistake and you'll probably lose L in all of this as well. Your life was fucking perfect, and here you are telling people how you feel. You should know by now that all that does is wreck the lives of others.
She liked you. She respected you. She cared about you, and you let her down. If you continue to tell her how you feel, you'll further ignite the damn bridge. If you keep it quiet, it'll kill you. If she finds this, she'll think you're immature and irrational and never talked to you again.
YOU SHOULD AHVE JUST FUCKING LET IT KILL YOU INSIDE! Anything is better than hurting your fellow man.
But is it? You say that, then act the opposite. You fucking waste of a human being.
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